Bah Humbug.

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My neighbor’s decorations were pretty on point this year.

So it’s December and the Christmas season is in full swing.

Why do I feel like Christmas was just here? I want to watch movies and decorate the tree and go see lights and fall head first into the Christmas spirit. I really do, but it’s just not exciting me.

I think it’s because this past year has been kind of a blur. Big things have happened, both good and bad, and it really flew by. So really I’m just not quite ready for another Christmas.

I’m also probably holding back from embracing it because to me, Christmas day has always been about waking up at my grandparents’ house. In 27 years, I have only missed one Christmas there, opening presents while my Grandma watched, then watching her open hers and my Granddad open his. This year, it’s to Grandma’s house and Granddad’s not going to be there. And I’m just not too sure how to handle that.

It’s really temping to just go on a trip for Christmas, but I can’t do that to my Grandma.

Starting this week, I’m going to try to throw myself into the holiday spirit. The hope is to come out full of happiness rather than fake smiles. I should probably start my shopping too. Might be a Christmas Eve kind of thing this year.

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